Brethren Court (

1716-1717, age 27-28 )

What is character consistency when you can just ignore everything that comes before this point, and use what comes after it to turn people into goddamn caricatures of themselves? This series is a goddamn mess and I list it, primarily to announce what I accept and what I reject. For the sake of brevity – as my salt here is even more vast than the fandom’s salt for Stranger Tides and Dead Men Tell No Tales combined, I will simply make as pointed an overview as possible.

Accepted Elements:

• Shadow Gold. Jack did in fact drink six of the seven vials – had he drank all of them, he would have been immortal and gained control over the shadows Henry Morgan himself controlled. As it is, by dumping the seventh to the sea, Jack altered himself much less dramatically – but no less poignantly.

  He has extended his aging process – rather than living forever, he ages at a much slower rate of one year per decade, thus why, twenty years from his true canon later, Jack is as spry and youthful as he was when he was forty. He also sees better in the dark than 90% of people as a result of the effects of the shadow gold on his system.

• Sao Feng. Jack’s history with Sao Feng, in that he assisted the man in getting the Deep Sea Opal and therefore wresting his title of Pirate Lord from his own brother, is accepted as canon.  

• Chevalle. The relationship Jack has with the penniless Frenchman who is Pirate Lord of the Mediterranean is honestly one of my favorite things to come from this series. Chevalle is someone Jack has known since he was a child – and someone he has been very mischievous toward for just as long. Chevalle attacked Jack not out of anger or spite, but rather out of pride and the need to feel he was not utterly defeated. Jack mocks the man’s dress and despises his lavender scent, but his memories of the man are mixed with amusement and annoyance. They are not friends, but they are more likely to ally than others might anticipate – despite their bickering about it and Jack’s frequent frustrations – as far as pirates go, they get along fairly well.

• Gentleman Jocard. A slave who organized a revolution and was then rescued ( albeit unwittingly ) in the midst of it by Jack, he served as the cook on the Black Pearl and later was gathered by the freed slaves and named the captain of the Ranger. He later becomes a Pirate Lord, through assisting Jack, and though Jocard says he must kill Jack if they meet again ( for being friends with him is bad luck ) in truth these two remain quite close, and again are quicker to ally than many would expect.

• Benedict Huntington. This man – I swear to god, he was the poor creator’s attempt at Cutler Beckett 2.0 And for as much as this annoyed me ( I greatly preferred Barbara and her control of matters ) one thing that is expressly important is that for all his efforts to kill Jack, Jack in turn actively fought to save the man’s life, and later personally brought Huntington back onto his own ship when the man was a scourge to pirates everywhere and left him the gift of immortal Captain Morgan to imprison. It is a huge illustration that for as much as they ignored, those in charge of this series understood that Jack was not a killer and went to great lengths to illustrate it.

• Sri Sumbhajee. Everything about him and his arc was a goddamn gift, fight me.  

• Jack’s familial relationships. Please see childhood for further insights.

Rejected Elements.

• Barbossa. For god’s sake this was just – sad. We know Barbossa betrays Jack in the end – the absolute cartoon villainy forced upon a man who is abundantly clever was frankly, insulting and cringe-worthy to observe. We do not learn how Jack managed to convince Captain Barbossa to sail with him – nor do we really get much flash back to Crispin’s work beyond the little bit about who happens to be Pirate Lord of the Caspian Sea.

  Crispin’s careful detailing of Barbossa’s mannerisms and frankly, commanding presence were thrown out the window in favor of Wiley E. Coyote, Pirate Version, and that will never be how I see Barbossa, nor how I see his time with Jack. However, the relationship between these two requires its own headcanon so I will keep this brief and to the point. While I do not doubt Barbossa questioned Jack’s very non-piratey behaviour and absolutely intended to take control of the Pearl, I refuse to accept he was so obvious, or so idiotic, about doing so.

• Mistress Ching. The relationship Jack has with Mistress Ching is touched on very lightly by Crispin, but it is one that I have – taken extreme liberties with. Crispin’sMistress Ching not only knew Jack Sparrow, but was actually rather fond of him and considered him to be amusing. Jack, in turn, openly admired her and knew beyond a shadow of a doubt that she was one of the most fearsome pirates in the world, commanding a fleet of ships greater than the Emperor of China himself.

  These two have a long history – one I will write up eventually – but for now suffice it to say Mistress Ching not knowing who Jack is, and wanting him dead on account of Teague, is frankly rejected. ( Frankly because Mistress Ching has far better ways of getting at Teague than by using a boy Teague himself barely acknowledges, but hey, that’s tea for another day. ) While she might not believe in the Shadow Lord business and still need to owe Carolina, she would not try to kill Jack without a very different cause. ( She has tried, and he has tried to kill her, but generally speaking it usually ends how Brethren’s fight did – with one or the other refusing to lay the finishing blow. That, at least, they did right. )