{ Sinday Memes }
It was novel, to be asked something so intimate. He understood the hesitation – it had been years, and even in their prime James had never truly been one for the more daring of physical initiatives. He blossomed under the attentions, in ways that had enraptured Thomas to the point it felt as if every waking hour was consumed with thoughts of the naval officer that had eased so unexpectedly into the depths of his heart.
It had been so much more than physical then – it was a desire of a different sort that had stirred them together to begin with. The desire for a mind to challenge, for scintillating conversation and above all else, for entertainment had been the draw at first. The more they circled one another’s orbits, the more those desires had drawn forth hidden depths until finally the line between enthusiasm and passion had been crossed.
Thomas had never forgotten those sweet moments, no more than he had lost the memory of the heat that could build between himself and the man before him. There were days now when he sought to stoke it – days when he did all he could to rile James up solely so that he could feel warm again. Whole, in the completion James could bring to him – and there were days when it cost him something to be touched at all. He ran hot and cold so often now it was a wonder James put up with him at all. A wonder that he had learned to ask – to see where he was when Thomas still forgot so often when his own torments were distracting him.
Realizing he had been silent too long, Thomas reached up and gently brushed his fingers against the man’s jaw. Stubble met him – rough and scratchy beneath his fingertips – and he raised his brows a bit as if to wonder if James had only asked this time because he knew how Thomas felt about beard rub. His lips twitched, the thought alone chasing away the last of his melancholy as he assured quietly, “You don’t have to ask today – though if this is here tomorrow,” He tapped a stubbled cheek, “I will dodge you on sheer protest.”
Ocean Archive 